2 Fears

There are 2 things I am scared about while sitting on the toilet...1.) Earthquakes, and 2.) Dieing.

Earthquakes:
In California, earthquakes are historical markers in peoples lives. They come up in repeated conversations years after the event.
David: “I remember the 2008 earthquake, I was giving a dissertation at Stanford on Extrapolating quantum physic’s fluidic motion when it happened."
Me: “Oh really, I was taking a monster chimichanga dump when it happened.”

Death:
David: “Dan died.”
Shirley: “How did he die?”
David: “He died taking a monster dump...”
Shirley: “Awww, just like Elvis.”

Note: Shirley and David are my imaginary characters, they help carry conversations.